Some things are meaningful; some are meaningless. Some are vaguely in-between.
This is our constant, natural experience in everyday life. It is only in religion, spirituality, and philosophy that people insist that everything is meaningful, or that nothing is.
Insisting that everything is meaningful is eternalism. Insisting that nothing is meaningful is nihilism.
Eternalism and nihilism are the simplest confused stances. Understanding what is wrong with them, and how the complete stance avoids their confusion, is key to the rest of this book.
Some experiences are pretty much meaningless. This is true even when they have a positive or negative effect on you.
Your usual bus left two minutes late; the Coke machine mistakenly gave you an extra coin in change; you spilled some of it on your shirt.
So what? Such things just happen. They don’t happen for any particular reason; they’re effectively random. They don’t have any implications beyond their immediate, small effect on you. They don’t tell you anything about yourself or about the universe, beyond the obvious.
You go for a hike alone in the desert, and your arm gets trapped between two rocks. You cannot free it, and after waiting several days for an improbable rescue, you realize you have the choice of cutting off your own arm with a dull knife, or dying of thirst.
Although an accident, this is a meaningful choice. If you survive, you will remember it as a meaningful experience. Though it was an entirely personal adventure, with no direct effect on anyone else, millions of other people are likely to find it meaningful as well.
We speak of “major life events”—marriage; giving birth; death of parent, child, or spouse; life-threatening illness; financial triumph or catastrophe. These are experiences most people would agree were highly meaningful.
Some things are more meaningful than others, evidently. You might say that meaningfulness and meaninglessness are a matter of degree, not either/or.
That’s not quite right, either, though. In many cases, it is difficult to say how meaningful an event was. This might not be a problem with knowing how meaningful it was, but an inherent nebulosity of the situation itself.
None of this is mysterious, or should be controversial. In fact, in ordinary circumstances, probably everyone would agree.
Still, there are situations that make it tempting to say that everything is meaningful, or that nothing is. These situations give rise to eternalism and nihilism. The rest of this chapter explains why these temptations arise, why we should resist them, and how.